Is This It? The Birth That Started With 8 Weeks of Labour
“Is This It?” I wondered when my contractions brought me to my knees at 34 weeks pregnant. At the time, I was camping with my husband and our two kids in the mountains, 2.5 hours from home, 1.5 hours away from any cell service.
We were walking alongside a creek close to our campsite when the contractions started that day, and I instinctively began swaying my hips back and forth as I leaned on the pebbles with my hands and knees, breathing slowly and focusing on relaxing my jaw and hands.
My husband was next to me within seconds, firmly massaging my lower back and squeezing my hips. He waited silently, knowing from experiencing this alongside me for the past 2 weeks in this pregnancy (+ for 6 weeks before the birth of our second babe) that I’d speak when I was ready.
“We better go back to the campsite.” I finally said.
He didn’t move, anticipating that he’d need to support me through another strong contraction. After the next wave passed, he quickly gathered our things and told our kids it’s was time to head back to camp.
I’d been having prodromal labour for almost 2 weeks by that point, and we had mostly relaxed into the assumptions that it would be (another) long road of daily “practice” before the real deal….but when the contractions started that afternoon they were so intense that they left me breathless… I couldn’t help but wonder if it was going to be IT.
At the same time… I wasn’t TOO concerned because I had experienced prodromal labour for 6 (yes, SIX!) weeks prior to my last birth and knew the possibilities and knew the likelihood that it would eventually stop…
My husband and I kept reminding ourselves of this as the contractions came on strongly and consistently every 5 minutes…! I was grateful that we had been re-reading Ina May Gaskin’s book together each night that week that is full of knowledge and strategies to ease discomfort that labour can bring on.
However, being a few hours away from home, camping in the mountains without any cell service sure did add an edge to these contractions!
We moved silently back to our campsite, stopping when another contraction brought me back to my knees. We made dinner together, and got the boys ready for bed without talking much, just going through the motions and moving through each strong contraction together.
We discussed packing up to go home, but decided to stay… something we knew from prior experience AND from extensive reading on the topic was that prodromal labour does NOT progress. And that is what happened this time. The contractions stayed consistently 60 seconds long, 5 minutes apart. And then, after 4-5 hours…. they stopped. No progression. My uterus was just warming up, just more intensely than the 2 weeks prior…. and it continued to do so for another 6 weeks.
Prodromal labour (NOT Braxton Hicks, I’ve had both! Very different). typically only lasts for a few days before birth but I’m one of the lucky ones that gets to experience it for weeks on end. With my second baby, it felt unbearable, this time I felt like I could handle it.
We got through that camping trip and decided to cancel the rest of our camping trips for the summer..: just in case.
The contractions continued coming daily, either in the afternoon, or the middle of the night, or both. And a handful more times before the real deal the contractions got extremely intense again and I had late-night texts with my midwife but then they would stop. This went on for around 8 weeks total… and even though it was an emotional, and physical rollercoaster that let me close to home, it led my body and my baby exactly where we needed to be, in the most perfect time.
When it was finally “it”, I was ready. I felt more ready than I’ve ever been, for anything before in my life.
The fears that I had earlier in pregnancy had vanished (or more accurately, had been worked through and cared for through very conscious and deliberate processing with my therapist).
My fears included:
What if I forget to remind myself to breathe through and relax into the intensity of the contractions to relieve pain and resistance? What if my support people will forget this too?
What if my pelvic floor can’t handle another birth & I do irreparable damage?
What if my recovery period will be more difficult for everyone to adjust this time with three small humans to care for?
And the most painful one… How will I do this without my sister?